what's to blame
what lead up to Double Dragon V: The Shadow Falls
And that leaves THIS week to discuss the game itself:
It's a not-terribly-good one-on-one fighting game.
To go into a little more detail:
- It has quarter-circle-style special moves
- It lets you pick any of the 10 different characters (all but two of whom are bad guys)
- It has a "slightly more story" mode (for good guys OR bad guys!)
- And as you saw last week, it has amusing character bios!
But here at GameWTFs, we're more interested in the stupid extras
than the stupid game itself
And this game has it in spades -- not only is "Dossiers" the "see all the character bios" option, but it has my SECOND FAVORITE FEATURE in any game* -- you can make the computer play
with against itself by choosing Battle Demo!
And not only can you watch the computer play ITSELF,
(with characters and locations of YOUR choosing),
...but almost every level has all kinds of
great bizarre spectators in the background!
Yep, Double Dragon V is definitely a spectator's sport...so let's meet some of the spectators in the various Metro City locations!
Dragon Dojo Exterior
While the Dragon Dojo Interior is all business (and empty of spectators), you only need to take a step outside to see several of Metro City's businessES!
Stage Left: features a lively GRILL(?) where a lady dances on the table. However, Shady Fellow in a sleeveless leather jacket and torn-kneed slacks has something much more exciting to watch: T.HAPPY and BLADE are throwing down (and each other!) in front of an ad for...
...RED DRAGON TEA (seen stage right). Meanwhile a cat swats at a rat in a dumpster next to a red motorcycle (that might have been designed by H.R. Giger)
Cody's Nutron Grill
Stage Left: a pipe-cleaner-arm lady cheers from the back of a much less creepy motorcycle.
Stage Right: Two more miniskirted women show off their incredibly insubstantial arms.
Metro City Sewer System
You'd think in the sewers, amongst the rats and the graffiti, you'd at least be able to fight in peace!
Stage Left: Reclining hobo wearing football shoulder pads looks on.
Stage Right: Admiral Shabby takes a trip to the land of raw sewage! I'd guess it's a welcome break from posing for Warhammer 40k miniature designers.
If there's one thing I know about fusion power plants, it's that they're great places for shooting lasers and fireballs!
Stage Left: Beefy Fusion Plant Security Guard Guy(?) is glad for the light entertainment of a fist-fight; it's not like he's doing anything important!
Stage Right: Fusion Plant Security Guard Lady dispels the myth that power plants are dangerous places which require full-body protective gear. As we can see, she's showed up for work in her gym clothes.
Well, on that note, let's wrap it up! Tune in next week for MORE of our Shadow Falls Spectator Spectacular!
— carlmarksguy, 2014-07-11